Recovery from Spiritual Abuse: Who Are you in the Eyes of Love?

Who Are you in the Eyes of Love?


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“When you love  your self, you Honor God.” – Dorothy-Inez Del Tufo

This is a radical, life changing point of view. God loves us and we can love ourselves.
If we don’t love ourselves how can we love our neighbor?

My clients call me MAMA BEAR because I have their backs and hold them in their highest possible. Here is why:

I wanted to know what to do with the gift I had since being a child.  I knew where it hurt. I saw there I needed to touch and when I did it brought healing. My family called it “having the touch.”

I found a place, the first church I had ever seen, where healing was part of worship, where laying on of hands was acceptable. I thought I had found my answers.

What appeared to be the call of love became an entanglement of control and mastery over my life.


Listen below to this meditation on who you are in the eyes of LOVE.

Under the guise of love and the possibilities of miracles, the church fathers taught that women are inherently bad, evil and less than, because Eve had lead Adam astray.

This elementally destructive mind set manifested itself in horrible ways. It resulted in many of the women in the congregation being beaten, because they were not submissive enough. Abuse and sexual assault was blamed on a the woman – she was told it was her fault for having the “spirit of Jezebel” in her. I saw women publicly humiliated, lives destroyed, cast out of homes, degraded and ridiculed for “transgressions” men were never held accountable for.


All this in the name of GOD, justified because the ruling body of men had decided women are “less than” because “God said so.”

Are you shocked? I am glad if you are shocked. I hope you have never seen or heard of this in a Christian body.  Ever.

But it happened and it still happens. This point of view still exists. And it’s many shades finds it’s way into the deepest crevices of our relationships, politics, and society.

I sometimes roll my eyes when I hear a conservative Christian men or women talk about how horribly Muslim women are treated. I gag because I had experienced much of the same mistreatment by the words, actions and hands of “good” Christian men.

After nearly five years of this insidious abuse, I was rescued by a visit by my loving parents who saw me changed, sad, being small and terrified.  Left the community, but the confusion, hurt and wounds came with me.

This experience damaged (but did not break) my core relationship to the Jesus I loved. It also sent me on a spiritual journey of recovery from distorted, politically co-opted, Patriarchal Christianity.

I was catapulted on a journey of looking for the connection to the divine I yearned for – one that is nourishing, living, affirming and safe. It unfolded in many phases and several adventures.

As a result of this journey I found a deeper love for my Self and the divine – in all of it’s aspects.

  • I know and feel now the magic connection of body and spirit that is alive.
  • I am fiercely committed to every woman seeing herself as loved by GOD and an exquisite, unique creation.
  • I will fight for her right to love herself and be the glorious contribution to this earth as she is meant to be.

Do you relate to this journey?

May I share what I have learned?

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